Understanding Myself

I realize that much of what I write about (aside from being long winded) is what I'm trying to work through to get myself back into alignment and back on "the path"-- to attempt to understand who I am, what is most important, why I keep doing the things I know are not helpful and what the heck we're doing here anyway.

I try to bring it back to yoga because it's a useful tether to a wisdom tradition to orient all this mind an heart stuff...but often i'm just dancing around in the dark, sharing my own confusion, devotions, questions and curiosities. I really don't know the way, or what "the path" even is. The more i practice yoga, the less I seem to know about anything...and I LOVE that!

While my ego hopes that at least some of what I share resonates with you, I'm becoming more unattached to what anybody else thinks. I've met and seen enough people and endured my own share of love and loss and doubt and fear and angst that I'm beginning to have some ideas about our collective human experiences from birth to death. I'll never really know what it's like to have lost someone you love deeply, or to experience your feeling of beholding your beloved for the first time, BUT I have had my own loved and losses and I know them well. There's something in our ability to feel that is out of the realm of communication and sharing-- It's so personal and beyond words when it's at it's deepest. So I know these words can only go so far. But I intend to keep speaking as authentically as I can, even if it hurts.

All this to say, what I share is my projection of reality, it's my own trip--hang ups, curiosities, confusions, blockages and my own work. Thank you for mirroring me, for teaching me, for reminding me to be a student of life. May we continue to get out of the way, out of the mind (when we're not using it)and back into my heart--to the big love, to the heart the the Beloved.